Mission Reformed Artery: Failed

delicious "get well" cake from Ganache in Greensboro

Okay, so it might seem like I just dropped off the face of the earth for a while. That's only partially the truth. I was actually in Greensboro, NC for a week, which is kind of the same thing, but with grits. The purpose of my visit was to tend to Alpha Dad, who was having heart surgery and needed a little TLC. With a little a help from our family's history of heart disease and Alpha Dad's penchant for fried foods, well, let's just say those arteries were not happy. And since I would be helping out with a lot of the cooking and menu planning, I thought this would be a great opportunity to share my “good for you can still taste good” philosophy.

Now one would think due to the serious nature of his condition that this would be the perfect time to step in and say, maybe you should think about throwing out that deep fryer. One might also think, now is the time to get the parental units to really inject some healthy eating habits into their diet. And maybe, maybe even get them to admit that the whole Atkins diet thing was just plain...crazy.

It seems that one would be completely wrong. Let me just give you a recap of my attempts to inject some reasonable dietary changes.

First attempt: healthy takes on bad-for-you foods. Cheesy jalapeno poppers and zucchini chips. They please crowds effortlessly. They are grilled and baked, respectively. What does Alpha Dad want to do? Fry them of course. Let me sum up this mentality briefly: If it can be grilled, it should be fried, and if it can be baked, then it should definitely be fried.

Brief diversion for arguing about which salad dressing has less fat.

Second attempt: the healthy snack. Everyone likes snacks, no reason we all shouldn't get to enjoy them because of hereditary conditions. My suggestion, get an air-popped popcorn maker. No oil, no fat necessary. Just plain old popping corn and some seasoning of your choice. At least with this one, I thought I was free and clear.

Enter, the mother ship in restricted airspace.

“Uhm, where's the butter?”
“We're not putting butter on it, that's the point. If you go and put butter on this popcorn, you have just completely defeated the purpose of this experiment.”
“But I like butter on popcorn.”
“The only reason we are having this popcorn is because dad agreed to not put butter on it.”
“But I'm still allowed to have butter.”
“Yes, but we're all eating out of the same bowl.”
“Okay, I'll just put it on my side.”

Butter appears seemingly out of nowhere.

Sigh.

Mission fail. Full retreat.

Or perhaps, just advancing in the other direction.

Tasty Salted Pig Parts

Speaking of the Ferry Building, there’s one more thing you really ought to know about, and that’s Boccalone, a salumeria whose motto is “tasty salted pig parts.” Now if their salumi selection didn’t get your attention, that motto certainly ought to. If you’re a fan of salumi in general, you may at first find yourself delightfully overwhelmed by their selection. Let me walk you through it so you don’t miss anything.

They have a refrigerator case with various salamis wrapped in paper as well as an assortment of fresh sausages and other pre-packaged meat products. Their menu is divided into three sections: cooked meats, cured meats, and salami. Additionally, if you need your fix right then and there, you can sample their wares by getting a salumi cone that harbors an assortment – that should help if you’re having trouble deciding what to take home. They also make sandwiches and panini that are served all day. You can order your salumi in four ounce portions to be sliced on request; you may have to wait five minutes or so while they fix up your order. I think this seems like the perfect time to pick up some cheese at the Cowgirl Creamery.

If there is one thing you absolutely need to try from Boccalone, it’s the mortadella. This is one of the (many) reasons I’m not a vegetarian. Whatever traumatic past experience you may have had with this often abused meat, this will heal you. Perhaps you’ve tried the disgusting pre-packaged, pressed mystery meat in the deli aisle of your favorite grocer. Perhaps you thought this was what mortadella was really supposed to be like and have spent every day trying to forget the taste and texture. Be healed.

A few more recommendations:

Cooked:

Mortadella-absolutely delicious, flavorful, great for snacking

Prosciutto Cotto-I can best describe this as fancy ham, good on panini or a croque monsieur.

Cured:

Lonza-very thinly sliced, it has a delicate texture and is almost tangy. good with a cheese plate

Capocollo-just plain good.

Salumi vs. Salami: What in the heck is the difference?

You may ask, aren’t salumi and salami the same thing? There’s been more than a little confusion over the difference between the two as salumi and charcuterie started showing up on more restaurant menus. (Read the amusing SF Chronicle article.) And the answer is no, no they are not the same. Salumi is an Italian word referring to cured meats, actually making salami a type of salumi. Salami is basically cured sausage that is fermented and then dried. Now you know.

Prather Ranch Hotdogs

Our friend Chris suggested hotdogs at the SF farmer’s market for lunch on Tuesday. He said they’re pricey, but really good. Okay, I’m always up for a hotdog, and everything at the Ferry Building is pricey anyway. But what I think he meant to say was, hey let’s go get some hot dogs at the farmer’s market, they’re addictive as crack and once you’ve had one, you’ll think of nothing else for days. Oh and it’s five bucks, but that’s a small price to pay compared to the taste festival that arrives in the crinkly tin foil they hand you. I think that’s what he meant to say. Prather Ranch dogs are made with organic beef from humanely raised cattle. The dogs are huge, grilled perfectly, with just a little bit of crunch on the outside, and the bun is thick and chewy and warm from the grill. They also have burgers and slaw. And slawburgers. And for an extra dollar you can get grilled red onions to top your dog, and that is a dollar well spent.

You can find these delicious dogs on the grill on Tuesdays, Saturdays, and now Thursdays at the San Francisco farmer’s market outside of the Ferry Building. Be sure to check out their retail store inside.

Thanks to Chris for the revelation.

Kona Brewing Company

Kona Brewing Co.’s Wailua Wheat, a summertime limited release that’s brewed with passion fruit is…surprisingly good. That about sums it up. Typically I’m wary of any beer brewed with fruit. Most turn out sweet, or just terribly wrong. The wife and I first tried the Wailua Wheat on tap at a restaurant in Monterey after our server recommended it. She brought us a taste and we were sold. It’s a flavorful wheat beer with no icky fruit “flavors,” no added sweetness. Just a good wheat beer for a summer barbeque. We found it later in bottles at Whole Foods and while were discussing whether or not to pick up a cold pack, a woman shopping nearby stopped to tell us how good it was. It’s clearly a beer people like to recommend. Now it’s my turn to do the recommending. So far this is the only beer I’ve tried from the Kona brewing company, but I’ve got plans for that to change.

Find it locally:

Beverages and More
Whole Foods

Sparkling Sangria

I have the perfect way for you to get your daily fruit serving: Sangria. This sparkling sangria recipe makes a great late brunch refresher and a nice fruity option for getting tipsy in the hammock. And because the fruit soaks for only a few hours, it absorbs just enough of the liquor to be snackable. Two people skilled in the fine art of tippling can easily go through a batch, so remember to stock up on bubbly. In fact, even if there’s just two of you, I’d still recommend picking up an extra bottle just in case you need to, uh, refresh those last pieces of fruit at the bottom of the pitcher. And don’t make any plans for Sunday afternoon.

Sparkling Sangria

¾ cup fresh sweet cherries, pitted
1 nectarine, sliced
1 white peach, sliced
1 small orange, thinly sliced
4 oz maraschino liqueur
1 oz peach bitters
1 oz orange bitters
1 bottle chilled brut Prosecco or Cava

Prep: Put the fruit in a large pitcher, then pour over the bitters and maraschino liqueur. Toss well. Cover and refrigerate for 3-4 hours, stirring at least once.

Serve: Stir the fruit and liqueur mixture once more, then slowly pour the sparkling wine into the pitcher, preferably at an angle to preserve the bubbles.

(If your serving pitcher isn’t big enough to hold the entire bottle, adding it in portions didn’t seem to hurt the flavor.)

Pour the sangria into glasses filled with ice cubes, the larger the better, making sure to put a decent amount of fruit in each glass.